I shared recently about how I felt as if I'd somehow missed Christmas...
I did miss celebrating Christmas for what it really is. But I think the issue goes deeper. What I really missed is Christ.
The last several months of my life have been marked by this feeling of loss, this feeling of missing Jesus. My daily bible reading has slacked off tremendously and my quiet times with the Lord... well, they have become virtually non-existent. I anger easily, I lose patience with my family, I'm snappy and on edge a great deal of the time. I haven't really enjoyed caring for my family as I once did. I don't laugh much anymore... I feel out of place somehow.
We've gotten into the routine of taking a winter vacation, in addition to a summer one. My husband says it is his stress reliever (lol). He plans for them, saves for them and ensures that they happen!
This year we went back to Gatlinburg, Tennessee (we went there last December). Only this time we went with his sister and her husband. We had hoped that her whole family would be able to go, but unfortunately both her daughters (and her son-in-law) had to work during the time frame we were gone.
We had so much fun! I love Gatlinburg, and would really like to visit there during the summer sometime (but we usually do a beach vacation in the summer). We enjoyed strolling the streets of downtown and visiting all the little shops. We visited Dollywood, country music singer, Dolly Parton's theme park. It was really something to see this time of the year ~ over 4 million lights ~ every thing was so beautiful!
I took down all my Christmas decorations this afternoon. All the Christmas gifts have been played with/used/put away. Everything is all back in its place in my house.
And this is when I get that sad feeling. Christmas is over. It went by in a blur. Time to get on with the new year.
I am saddened even more than usual this year because somehow I feel like I missed Christmas. I missed the coming of the Christ-child. The season went by in a blur and a whirlwind without me even slowing down. Unlike Mary, I didn't spend time pondering the meaning of it all in my heart.